One of my favorite self-help books is The 5 Love Languages. This is my top recommendation to clients, family, friends, strangers…anyone I come into contact with. Why? Because The 5 Love Languages is a quick and easy read and can help us learn how our partner best receives love. This knowledge can become especially valuable during the holidays when deciding how to shower that special someone with appreciation and love.
I highly recommend reading the book for a more in-depth description of each love language, but I’ll give you the quick and dirty summary of each language along with holiday gift ideas.
Love Language #1: Gifts
This love language is often misunderstood, and is more than simply giving any old gift. A person with this love language feels most loved through gifts that are thoughtful and meaningful. Read more about this love language here.
Gift Ideas – Consider gifts that your present-loving partner wouldn’t buy themselves or items they may have mentioned desiring in casual conversation. And don’t get stuck thinking of physical objects, great gifts can include experiences (golf rounds) or services (facials/massages).
Love Language #2: Words of Affirmation
A person with this love language, feels love through words. Especially compliments, praise, verbal encourage, and even sweet text messages.
Gift Ideas – To fill this person’s love tank, any present must be accompanied by a thoughtful note expressing your genuine feelings. The note can be brief and doesn’t have to be full of fancy wording, just be honest and heartfelt. That will get the job done!
Love Language #3: Quality Time
A person with this love language receives love best when spending one-on-one time, usually in person, with their partner. The quality part can vary in duration and range. It can be anything from watching episodes of a favorite show each week, meeting for a run, connecting via FaceTime for a nightly call, or going on a weekly dinner date.
Gift Ideas – An experience gift planned with your partner’s interests in mind would likely be a huge success. It could be as grand as a weekend getaway to a favorite destination or as simple as a date that includes visiting your partner’s favorite shops, restaurants, and bars.
Love Language #4: Acts of Service
A person with this love language is looking for their partner to nurture through action or take care of burdensome/stressful tasks and responsibilities.
Gift Ideas – This person may love receiving services as a gift that ease life’s stressors such as regular house cleaning, a wine delivery subscription, or tech that solves a particular problem or adds something valuable (like an activity tracker, home tech product).
Love Language #5: Physical Touch
Finally, we come to the last love language. Despite what you might immediately assume, physical touch is about much more than just sex. A person with this love language feels most loved when hugged, kissed, patted, snuggled with, etc… The sensation of all meaningful and intentional touch conveys validation and connection.
Gift Ideas – For newer relationships a couples massage would be a great gift. For more serious relationships, consider planning an evening that includes activities that build emotional connection and lead to physical intimacy…with a few bells and whistles that your partner would enjoy (lingerie, candles, music, etc).
If you want to knock your holiday gift out of the park, take a little time to determine your partner’s love language. Choosing a gift through the lens of love languages will ease the decision making process and result in a present that, no matter what is actually is, conveys your authentic feelings of love. And after all, that’s really what it’s all about!
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